Unicorn Tears

Art by Dejan Radic

Non-Alcoholic Energy Drink

In the Wizard’s lair a chained unicorn lays weeping. His pitiful sobbing brightens the day of the Wizard and his dutiful henchmen, who collect the unicorn’s tears for this drink. Electrodes are attached to the unicorn’s nipples, as this provides the most colorful, fruity liquid.

A full blend of B vitamins and caffeine, the tears contain everything found in a commercial energy drink, but also 5-HTP for serotonin regeneration, and piracetam to improve intellectual function.

Flavoured with mulberry, black currant, pomegranate, hibiscus and rose, this drink has a lovely floral bouquet but may turn your pee neon green.